Being thankful this Holiday season

 

It is the Holiday season and I love it 

Christmas is coming fast I love the season because people are kinder, hope and peace all around.

The vaccine oh almost forget today we finally get the vaccine in the USA for covid 19.   It will be a while before everyone gets the Vaccine. but we now have hope.

 I decorated the house with lights and a tree I think of all the Christmas times before. mom loved it so she decorated the whole house we sang Christmas songs to her classic holiday records blasting on the stereo. I remember cooking and mom covered in flour she always said the messier the better it tastes,  miss mom a lot now that I have had cancer I cried during chemo at times in the night wanting her to hold me Like when I little and not feeling well. and then like I said the holiday memories of her are all around me. The decorating the music and the smells of her recipes that I now cook.

this is not an advert but I remember the cardinals we would get so excited when we would see one in our backyard mom loved them as I do today.  I found a saying or meme one day it said cardinals are messengers from heaven from loved ones lost I have heard many versions of this saying and I believe that when I see one it is moms watching over me I saw many when I was going through chemo they made me feel better, well anyway I made an image this year of cardinals for my shop in her memory it did so well I thank everyone so much. here it is. Have a wonderful Christmas everyone.

Cardinal from heaven ceramic ornament
by RenderlyYours

End November Thanksgiving

Thankful

thankful to be alive and in remission

thankful for my loving husband and so many friends and family who have prayed and kept my spirits up

but this year I have a special thanks  it is to the people who volunteered for testing of vaccines for covid 19 

and for all the healthcare workers who have responded and held people during the pandemic. 

I am thankful for the scientists and doctors coming up with vaccines.

I am thankful for our troops and the freedoms they fight for. 

I am sad that more people are being diagnosed every day with covid 19 and we are up to 250 thousand dead.

I am sad so many are out of work. that we are entering shutdowns and again kids homeschooling.

I am sad so many fight about politics and have forgotten to love one another in some cases.

little update

 we got the blood work it says no cancer markers haven't heard about the group meeting on the removal of ovarian tumor,

we have decided though since we have a huge uptick in virus right now we will only go out when needed like food pick up.

my knee is giving me a lot of trouble waiting on that as well we do not want to die of covid I hope all is ok with you hugs all.

october- cancer update

 

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Update waiting on blood work to make a decision on surgery they can either

use a robot to remove the left ovary and large growth but if cancerous will need

additional surgery at providence hospital, or could go to providence and have a huge

belly cut do the same but do additional surgery if needed then and their age and

weight make belly cut surgery more dangerous. and longer recovery. Blood work

should help with decisions.

UPDATE PART 2 so we got a phone call this morning from the doctor they are

calling my case special because of my lymphoma so going to put my case in

front of a surgical forum for women and infants at providence hospital, part of

I say WHAT are you serious! how bad is this? really you are scaring me.

another part says ok having multiple opinions from experts and coming to

the conclusion is what you want the best plan right? talk about tears and confusion

all when I just woke up, well feeling better now thought about it I think anyway.

Don’t let it dominate your life, Donald Trump said this about COVID!

Let me tell you any disease that can kill dominates your life without your permission!!!!!!

you do not let it no it just does!!!!! I can say this with my cancer I didn't do anything to get

follicular lymphoma most do not know what causes this blood cancer like Leukemia children

not alive long enough to have done something to cause it, All cancers dominate lives cancer

makes the person sick and need life-saving treatments that are awful and make you sick,

some die the family goes through a lot caring for the person and if they die a lifetime of

sorrow and pain. don't let it dominate Mr trump? What are you saying? again it dominates

we do not let it we have no control. Mr. Trump you just really do not care about people just

your political garbage is all. over 200 thousand deaths because of COVID a virus and still

you do not care Mr trump I pray for our country all the time. we are not in control it is we can

fight and we do fight to get rid of it to get well we do what doctors say unlike you trump we

fight these monsters. you are lucky sir you walked out with all your meds and steroids but

do not brag instead care about all those lives lost to the disease all the families suffering what

it took from them and to those in hospitals fighting to breathe... Mr. Trump.

my results of 6 mo scan

so this week I am going for more tests because in my cat scan they saw something on my ovaries that has moved pretty upset because i suffer anxiety and i do not think any women likes her vajj out for all to see especially older women so upset for many reasons but like aways I am a fighter and will work through this



UPDATE Sept4 --Well went to docs CAT scan was good I have one node still in my lower abdomen it was the aggressive one that was over 2and half CM it is still shrinking smaller than 1cm so good. And rest all still gone and blood work was Good, Next scan in 6 mo, I have a large cyst on my ovary they will probably remove after I meet with another doc. And probably will be soon waiting on a call, asked about port removal he said wants to wait on the ovarian cyst and see what happens with that. So port flush tomorrow. Hugs all , thankful for you all.



________________________________________________________________

this is when i first heard and wrote on facebook

Well, everyone, I have been crying all morning because here we go again. It started with a weird call this morning from gynecology at kent hospital setting an appointment. Huh? Why? Well, something was seen on your ultrasound. Uhhh no, we didn't have an ultrasound but did have a cat scan. Ok, let us call Dr. Joseph's office and find out what is up. So we call oncology (Dr. Joseph) office. They apologize, apparently, the referral got ahead of the call to us. They saw something in CT scan, a mass has moved. What?? so I have a mass on my ovaries that was seen before but it has changed position since then. So they are scheduling all kinds of tests for me starting with vaginal ultrasound. Yuck! And a gynecology exam and pap smear to start, next could be a biopsy and or removal of it or ovaries or more treatments. I am so upset I was really hoping to be one of those many who go years with no issue in remission. And these exams and location upset me so much with some issues I have with anxiety, depression, and PTSD, on top of worries about the stage of it if it is cancerous, and death, crying.

covid tired

Staying at home us not bad but the fear of getting the disease and all that comes with gets long and tiring. 

The good  together time with Jonathan first puzzle ever done together,awww is right haha. I guess I do not write as much these days, excitement is limited it seems. Politics are huge and black lives do matter.

Virus is still out there stacking humans. And people are still argung about having to put masks on when out. We are ok worried but ok. Love you all. 

This is first puzzle we did love it and second is pic of next one we are working on.

National cancer survivor day

It has been 6 months since my last chemo The day after thanksgiving a lot to be thankful for and a wonderful Christmas gift finding out I was in remission, I thank all my friends and family and all the doctors and nurses I love you all. it has been a long 6 months in some ways we have the virus going around this year and isolated at home and I am extra cautious, but I have been doing better a bit grumpy and depressed at times but otherwise pretty good, I am grateful for so much, but mostly for my life mine and everyone around me strength love and hope. God bless all those survivors out there and families and hugs and prayers to those still fighting, celebrating life as a survivor is important it shows others what is possible giving so much hope. and reminds our selves as survivors of the strength we possess.

Update May

Well, we are nearing the end of May and it has been 3 mos of isolation because of the virus-like I said before I am kind of used to hanging out at home but I didn't realize the little I did get out and how it always felt really good even getting out for photos at the lake or ocean. Well, what have you all been doing during this time for fun or make the time go by? we have been doing all kinds of stuff from gardening in our yard playing video games and cooking together spring cleaning and movie watching?

I have been keeping a bullet journal since my chemo ended I do art and adult coloring and together with my husband something I hadn't done for years is doing puzzles we enjoy an hour or 2 after dinner working on a puzzle. we also even though older folk do enjoy Xbox and PlayStation games. well stay safe sending hugs.

The puzzle we are working on 

find more puzzles journals and masks click here 

difficult paw print puzzle
by RenderlyYours</

Serenity Prayer Jigsaw Puzzle
by RenderlyYours

African Safari Puzzle
by RenderlyYours

Fairy night forest Puzzle
by RenderlyYours

moon light fairy Beleive Jigsaw Puzzle
by RenderlyYours